The Meaning of My Heaven
by XxDarkXxcherry
Summary: There's an emptiness in me, the emptiness I can not come to understand. It's not from, fear, sadness, nor anger. What is this emptiness I'm feeling? Am I forgotten? Or am I still searching? What am I searching for? Sesshomaru/Inuyasha
1. The Anger Begins

It wasn't supposed to be like this. How did everything go so wrong? My betrayal, my rage, my promise everything, every single thing was for nothing. Our travels too many villages, all those memories for what? To be tossed aside?

"Kagome what are you trying to say?" Inuyasha asked as he stood before the girl of his dreams, one he protected and would even give up his life for. The girl who made him feel wanted, the girl who gave him hope, and the girl who he considered his best friend. Now here she was, standing before him, showing a face he never knew she held, she hid, and now showing. Her expression was unforgiving and angry, angry than he's ever seen before.

"I'm saying I'm done, I'm sick of everything" The hanyou had no idea where she was getting this from, but from every word she spoke every time his heart seemed to hurt. "I'm just so tired of being here Inuyasha"

"I don't understand Kagome! What are you trying to say?" Kagome's eyes seemed to narrow down even further.

"No I don't know how you would seem to understand Inuyasha! I'm sick of everything! I'm sick of Kikyou, I'm sick of looking for the damn shards and I'm the only one here who seems to suffer on the other side when I get home!" Inuyasha was a backed, but he knew those weren't the reasons to her anger.

"Kagome I've stopped seeing Kikyou because I knew how it hurted you! When we started the search you knew what you were going to miss at your school thing and you didn't seem to complain all those other times! Why are you angry? Why are you really angry Kagome?" The black haired teenager looked away from the half-demon and stared towards the grass which seemed a lot more interesting at the moment.

"Inuyasha when we collect all of the Shikon No Tama what do you plan to do?" This question flew above the air as an awkward silence formed between the two. Inuyasha confused by her question and Kagome hoping that he would choose the right answer.

"I want to become a full fledged demon, you know that..." Kagome's bangs hid her eyes from the tears that threatened to fall from her eyes, that's not exactly what she wanted to hear.

"And then what? Leave me behind? Is that all you planned to do?" Inuyasha feeling terrible walked close towards Kagome.

"Kagome..I-I didn't know.. "The black haired teenager stepped back, Inuyasha's heart felt even worse as he watched her take her step back, she was willing to leave him behind. She was willing to leave him in the dark, lost. "Have you forgotten all we've had? ALL THOSE TIMES KAGOME! Kagome... I- I love you... Kagome" Inuyasha felt as if he took his heart from his chest and held it in his hands to give to the girl.

"Love? Inuyasha this has never been about love!" Though the girl refused to acknowledge it, disgusted and held no emotion towards it Inuyasha felt broken. His light rejected him; the one hand he thought was there to pull him through was no longer... there his path he followed was no longer there where was he supposed to go now?

"K-kagome..is that how you really feel?" He asked cursing himself for sounding so weak. At the moment he didn't look at the girl, how could he? All those times, those eyes, those eyes he thought held the pure innocence of her were all lies all of them.

"Inuyasha this isn't about us! Don't you get it? I just needed to know in order to decide to destroy to the stupid jewel in the end! I want this madness to end don't you?" Inuyasha's eyes perked up by her sudden idea.

"What about Sango and her brother? What about the others that might need it?" Kagome huffed at his words.

"She doesn't need it, no one does" Was her only reply, Inuyasha only felt worse. Everything she was saying was all an excuse so that she wouldn't say the real thing she kept. Was this the only way to go? So pathetic that he didn't need to hear her real reason?

"Alright then, go" Kagome looked at the half-demon confused.

"What are you saying?"

"Go and tell Sango what you re telling me! Go and tell Shippo that you've had enough of everyone!" Inuyasha growled, he too was sick. It just seemed as if his heart was falling, going under the dark abyss ..just falling forever.

"I'm not going-"

"Oh so you ll tell me, but fuck over everyone else is that it?" The dark haired teenager glared at the demon and walked away from him. "That's it then; you're just going to walk away" He gritted his teeth in anger and disgust as he mumbled. "Just like everyone else..." The anger within him was so great that he yelled and screamed as he took out his sword and made it transform. He needed to take out his frustration out, on anything! "Wind Scar!" He screamed full of rage, he couldn't believe! Prefect by nature and just what he needed getting fooled! His friends Miroku, Sango and her demon cat, and Shippo all came running to witness the mess of trees that were through in all directions.

"It's not fair! Fuck Kagome it's not fair!" The half-demon yelled as he punched the grounds of the earth.

"Inuyasha! Inuyasha what happened?" He heard a voice coming from his left side he looked up to find Miroku bent down beside him along with Sango while Shippo was on his right.

"Where's Kagome?" Sango said worriedly, Inuyasha chuckled coldly.

"She's gone and I doubt she's ever coming back Sango." Miroku in the other hand didn't understand.

"Where to? Was she kidnapped?" Inuyasha looked dull and shook his head.

"No, she just left. She said she was sick and tired of everyone and she left!" Shippo knowing Kagome refused to believe anything his dog friend was saying.

"No Kagome would never leave us like this! I know Kagome and she cares for all of us!"

"She fucken lied! She lied to all of us! She had us fooled while she did whatever the fuck she wanted!" He said as anger started to rise again within his blood. "That stupid bitch left us!"

"SIT!" Came a voice coming towards their direction. Everyone turned to see that Kagome was coming to them while holding a bottle of water. Inuyasha hit in the earth's ground surrounded by a huge hole around him.

Kagome! Kagome! Shippo yelled as he ran towards the girl. Kagome smiled at the little fox and closed the top of the bottle.

"Whats this about me being a bitch Inuyasha?"

"Lady Kagome! Inuyasha here told us that you wanted to leave? That you really didn't care about us and fooled us" Miroku said looking quite carefully towards the Miko friend of his. Kagome gasped in horror by the accusation that came towards her.

"What? Inuyasha who could you? I-I thought you loved me!" Kagome yelled as tears began to stream down her eyes. The half-demon stood up from the ground and glared at the miko, how fucking dare she!

"You said it! Don't you dare come back and call me the liar you stupid bitch!"

"You just here to hurt me aren't you?" Kagome yelled in sadness, Miroku, Sango and Shippo all stared towards the crying Miko and felt very sorry for her.

"Inuyasha that's enough!" Sango stated very angry. Inuyasha stared at the demon slayer in disbelief.

"No guys she really said that she didn't give a fuck anymore!" The dog demon said in desperation, this just couldn't be happening to him!

"Stop lieing Inuyasha! I can't take it anymore!" Kagome yelled as her knees grew weak and fell to the floor.

"Kagome!" All of her friends screamed as they ran towards the girl who was dying in pain. Inuyasha stood there as his eyes widen in shock, this is what she wanted, and this is what she planned, but why? Why was she holding his last breath? Did he wrong her in some way? Did he not protect her enough?

"Kagome..." Inuyasha said in the almost instant tears.

"I think it's enough that you hurt her" Sango said, Kagome feeling weak but strong enough to talk said.

"I told you half-demons are confused and don't know what they want! They were meant to be alone! Half- demons don t get along with HUMANS" She said with the last word filled with venom. Inuyasha felt as if his whole world turned upside down, WHY? FUCK! It s always been the fucking same!

"Fine..you know you're right, I fucken hurt you and like that I leave..don t bother looking for me" The hanyou said as he began to walk his ways. Miroku at this point thought it was a very foolish move on his behalf.

"Inuyasha wait!" The monk yelled Inuyasha stopped a brief moment; the two girls looked towards what the monk was going to do. "You two go on ahead, there is something I need to speak with him" Kagome looked as if she was going to object, but said nothing when she saw Miroku s hard stare.

"Alright Miroku, I understand we'll meet up back at camp" Sango stated as everyone else headed back.

"What is it that you want now monk?" Inuyasha said refusing to look at his friend.

"Where are you going?" Was what he questioned instead of answering. He refused to turn for the look of sadness or perhaps even hate that might break his spirit of what held them so close.

"I don't know... somewhere that isn't here" Inuyasha answered and ran off without saying another word. Miroku yelled after his friend, he didn't understand what exactly could be going on with his friend?

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Darkcherry: Hurray New story! XD

Sesshomaru: What will happen to the last one?

Darkcherry: It will continue...I just need to blow off a candle..

Sesshomaru: That doesn't make any sense

Darkcherry: Nothing I say ever does! XD

Sesshomaru: I knew that already before

Think this is enough to have some reviews?


	2. Heaven?

Inuyasha's POV

As I ran I had no idea to where I was even going, but at the moment I didn't care. I felt the wind run across my hair like I've seen it many times make due dancing along the leaves when they strangely changed their color and fell off the on holding trees. I barely took notice towards my surroundings and as I stopped I barely took notice at all. The whole area was something I have never seen before, where was I? Everything and everywhere was surrounded by wheat, I think from grounds and grounds on end. I have no idea on what exactly I'm seeing, but it's beautiful.

"You, what are you doing here?" A sudden voice said as I saw someone come out of the wheat field. He like all the rest was a demon, his hair was short towards his shoulders, his eyes were blue as the sky, and he wasn't as tall as he made himself feel.

"I don't know, I just ran and I ended up here" I said as I tried to explain myself as possible. Though at the same time I kept wondering in a question I didn't even know if I should have asked, but I asked anyway. "What is this place?" The demon in front of me raised an eyebrow in question; he slowly looked straight at my eyes as if he was trying to look right through me.

"This place?" The said demon turned around, now I couldn't see his expression anymore. Something about him made me shiver coldly. "This place ...is my meaning of heaven" What did he just say? Heaven? What is that?

"What's Heaven?" I asked, the thought of it made me want to feel so free. The demon in front of me turned once more, but this time he stared right at me. His eyes glistened from within the shining light of the moon I didn't even know when it started to get dark, how long was I out away from my friends? My friends ...the thought of them made me want to growl, but his next words made me change everything I use to think.

"Heaven? Why that's easy" He said as I saw a smile make his way among his face. "Heaven can be whatever you want it to be..." I stared straight at him. My heaven can be whatever I want it to be? Really?

"How do you know when you find this Heaven?" I asked, at this point I was very curious. The demon chuckled.

"You don't find heaven" I narrowed my eyes, then how is it... .And just like as if he was reading my mind he answered. "You let your heaven find you"I let it find me?

"How would I know when I have found it? Or when it finds me?" Then once again he answers me in puzzles.

"You don't get it do you?" The demon turned and swayed his arms around. "Look around you! This wheat field, what exactly comes to your mind when you see it?" I stared at the field before me, the wind gently blew across the long strands of wheat, and it looked like the many waves of water.

"Like ...a free bird"

"Exactly, this is my heaven. It chose me to be here" I stared at the wheat field and then back at the demon. This place was his ideal of heaven... then what was my ideal of heaven? He told me it was whatever I wanted to be, but if it chose me then wouldn't that mean I didn't exactly have what I wanted? This was getting to be confusing.

"How did you know it choose you?" I asked, I have to know. Its not like I'll hear something like this ever again or I might not see this beautiful wheat field again either.

"The letters from the sky show you"

"Wait, you said that heaven can be whatever I want it to be right? But if it chooses you, then how is it exactly what I chose it to be?" The demon chuckled once more, maybe this was pointless. Maybe I wasn't meant to have a heaven.

"Heaven you foolish half-breed, is your trapped little perfect world" My own little trapped world?

"My own world..." I said aloud without noticing, the demon smiled deeply.

"You finally got it, when it finds you, you'll know" He said as he slowly made his way back into the wheat field. Before he completely disappeared I yelled.

"Wait what's your name?" I could barely hear him, but I'm lucky I'm a demon or at least half of it.

"The names... Kanon Shinku" That was the last I ever saw of Kanon. I slowly made my way back to where I ran away from, little did I know that the search for my own perfect world was about to begin.

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Darkcherry: It's short I know, but I actually felt complete when I wrote this chapter. Will Inuyasha find his perfect little world? What will Sesshomaru have to do with his Perfect little world of his that he has in mind? read and review to find out!

Inuyasha: You have something in mind?

Darkcherry: You'll see! XD


	3. We didn't share

Inuyasha walked slowly back towards his friends. As he walked he started to ponder on what exactly his little world would be like. Did he deserve his own world? Would he ever find it? Would it find him? Would he finally feel free after so long of torture and torment? All these questions continued to rise within his mind, but he knew no answer to either one. Then his friends began to rise within the puddle of questions, would they be able to come along with him? Would he want them to come? Did he picture his own heaven without his friends? He shook his head deciding that wasn't a road he was ready to take yet. The walk was quite long actually, it amazed him that he was able to run for so long, but as the camp site was coming into view he noticed something that was out of place. His friends weren't having their usual breakfast; because they were too busy fighting off the demons that attacked them all. This didn't make any sense! Why didn't he smell their aura? Why didn't he hear anything? He felt a warm presence on his back, it was beginning to sun rise, and he was gone. He was gone throughout the whole night, how long have they been fighting? Inuyasha quickly drew out his sword and it transformed and ran towards the hoards of ogre and snake demons that attacked.

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Inuyasha's Pov

As I ran, I looked around my surroundings. Sango rode on her cat demon on the sky while she swung her boomerang and sliced and ogre in half, Miroku was on my left as he took his hand cloth off and used his wind tunnel to suck in many snake demons that tired a sneak attack, and far off my right was Kagome, she and Shippo were working together. Everything seemed to happen so slowly, the running of the demons, the defenses my friends made and the screams that surrounded the area. Here I was ...standing in the middle of everything and I didn't know what to do.

"Inuyasha!" I heard my name being called, I turned to my right and just as before I heard her. I heard Kagome yell my name; she yelled for help, it was still so slowly like. I ran towards her as I swung Tetsusaiga at all the other demons that thought could come my way. I didn't understand! I saw this coming, I did, but I made no move to make anything change. Right as I was ready to head straight towards her I saw a snake demon right behind her. Behind her, I could have yelled for her to look out, and I would have protected her, but I didn't. I didn't and that was my fatal mistake. "Inuyash-" Was all I heard Kagome say lastly. Again, everything was still in slow motion, it never ceased to begin with, but the snake demon was able to raise his tale and stuck it through Kagome's chest. The blood ran down her blouse as I saw her eyes go from bright with light to a dark dull color. Her hands let go of her bow and arrow, her body went numb as her head swung in a down word motion.

I stood there, completely in shock. I did not move, nor did I flinch. I just stood there. Everything was happening too fast, but as I looked around everything was as before, nothing seemed to have changed. The same demon that killed Kagome came after me next, but I swung my sword and yelled the words.

"Wind Scar!" I saw it scream in terror as his tale left nothing, but the rest of Kagome's body falling towards the grounds of the earth. The demons where gone, Miroku took care of that, but that was supposed to be my job. Everyone ran towards Kagome, her body was still the same as she was stabbed and as she fell, it was lifeless and I continued to stand there with my sword in hand. I didn't understand what just happened.

"Kagome! Kagome!" I heard Sango scream as she carried her in her arms. Tears streamed down her eyes as she buried her face in her lifeless chest. Her cries and screams seemed like an echo that surrounded the earth and that could be heard from miles away. Miroku took Sango s hands off the lifeless body while the demon slayer struggled to fight through the monk's actions. The little fox demon cried right along with the demon slayer as he cried right off the bat into the monk's arms. Finally I saw Sango give up her losing battle to keep her friend held against her and cried right into Miroku's arms. This was there... world a world I could never comprehend, a world I would never be able to enter. I finally put my sword back into its sheath; this made everyone have their attention back towards me. Time seemed to have stopped moving slowly. Sango was the first one to come up towards me, her tears continued to drop down her eyes, but it was no longer of sadness. These were tears of anger.

"You son of a bitch!" The demon slayer yelled as her fist connected right into my face. My head swung to the left as the action took its place.

"Sango!" I heard Miroku yell in the back ground, the running of his shoes on the grounds made me believe he was running towards the demon slayer.

"He let her die Miroku!" Sango yelled, this I knew she was right. I did let her die, but it wasn't because of the rage I held against her or because of the annoyance I thought she was. I didn't know why I let her die, but I did. I did no action to tell Sango I was going to strike back, I did not know what was wrong with me, this was my entire fault.

"This isn't the action to take Sango!" Miroku said in a stern yet gentle voice, the demon slayer seemed to have calmed down a little.

"This isn't fair Miroku!" She didn't deserve to die! I heard Sango say in a whisper, Shippo ran towards me.

"How could you? Didn't you want to protect her? I hate you! She was right! Half demons don t ever know what they want!" All these words came out the little one, and they were directed to me and me alone. He was right along with Kagome; I didn't know what I wanted. Everything was just so out of place.

"Leave him be everyone..." Miroku said, I stared towards his way disbelieving his own words. Sango took that as a sign and called her demon cat along her side, she as Sango was also glaring at me with hatred. Shippo jumped on the demon slayer's shoulders and they both rode off into the sky promising in silence to come back for Miroku. I just stood there still, looking at the monk's eyes with uncertainty.

"You know what you did will never be able to be forgiven correct?" I said nothing and he took this to continue on further. "You will have to take Kagome back to her time, to her family so that she is properly able to be buried" My eyes widen, I have to take her back? This was a sign for the monk and coldly spat. "What did you intend to leave her here?"

"I-I didn't know... what I was doing" I finally said as a sign of surrender.

"It seems that you never do Inuyasha, but because of that ignorance Kagome is now dead" As he walked right passed me he finished off his final sentence I'll ever hear him utter to me. "It is best that we never see each other again" And like that his world was closed off mine ...because... that was a part of heaven we didn t share.

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Here is chapter three! Don't shoot because it's short! DX/

Darkcherry: Here is another filled complete chapter

Princess Bubble Gum: You do know your making him suffer right?

Darkcherry: I think that's what the people came to read for!

Princess Bubble Gum: How about a happy ending?

Darkcherry: Ohhh those suck ass!

Think it's enough for a review?


	4. Nothing is ever Certain

This chapter is for my friend Ripay because honestly she s fucking awesome! XD

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Inuyasha's Pov

I stood there, looking the way my best friend walked. After a while I finally made myself start to walk, I walked towards the body that lay upon the floor. Just once, just this once I wished for the ground to open its big mouth to swallow the body before me, but nothing happened. I picked her up, her body was so lifeless. Her skin that was once ripe was now pale, her eyes closed like the many times I've seen before when she fell asleep, but this time it was different. This time it wasn't going to be the sun rays to show her a sign of life to wake.

It's funny to know the memories one would keep. I remember once when I was a little boy my mother would hold me close to her and we would hug for hours on end. This was when I never knew the meanings of death.

"Inuyasha honey" I heard say to me in a gentle voice. The tears I remembered wouldn't cease to fall; one just kept coming after the other one. "It's okay honey" She told me. I didn't understand, no one ever does. It was a time I begged my mother to let me keep a bird, it had fallen off its tree and I wanted to help it get better, but one day it decided not to wake up.

"Mommy why won't it wake up?" I remembered saying to her in whimpers. At first she didn't say anything for a hard long while, as if debating on how to explain the meaning of death carefully to a seven year old.

"Inuyasha, your bird is gone" Was all the best way she could explain it to me. I still didn't understand.

"Gone? Gone where mommy? Is he coming back?" I stared at the little bird that was still on top of earth's grounds. I remember feeling my mother soothe me as she stroked my hair up and down with her right hand as her left holded me so still.

"No honey, he's never coming back" I looked up towards her as if I didn't want to believe her words.

"Why not?" Again my mother said nothing for such a long while, this time I didn't know what she was thinking. At this time, I knew she didn't understand the meanings of death either and what she was about to tell me was mere nothings.

"Nothing is ever certain Inuyasha" Those are the words she told me, and those were the words I promised to hold to my heart until the end. Expect her death was sooner than I thought it was. The walk was longer than I expected, and throughout all the way I continued to think over the last days we held together and what my life would be like now. Would my search continue?

The search for what?

I didn't ever know anymore. Would it be my search for the jewels on till now? Would it be for my perfect world?

Is this what I wanted?

I didn't even know where to go next. My first stop would be to carry Kagome back to her time, and there it was. The tree the tree that bounded both of us. The tree that made me miss 50 years of my life, the bark in which held me asleep without disruption, and the tree that made a girl change her life forever and made a half-demon finally realize that this wasn't his life to begin with. As he passed the tree, the sun was beginning to set down once more. It seemed the days grew a lot shorter every passing day, but we made it. The well.

It was the distant between my time and hers. The time that changed in hers and the time that stayed the same in mine. I jumped in with Kagome in my arms and saw all the time flow through me like water in a lake. I liked it, and somehow I wished my perfect world to be exact. Though my comfort only lasted a moment and now I was at the bottom and fear grew within my heart. Slowly I jumped out of the well as I jumped in it before, here I was. I walked out the shrine in which kept the secret well hidden from any other human, and saw the same tree in mine time through Kagome's. My thoughts, my thoughts came towards the reaction in her mother's eyes. Her house was right in front of me, lights could be seen from within the glass that protected the so called windows.

Slowly once more I made my way close to the shelter before me. I stood right before the door the cut me off from Kagome's family and me, the door in which I was afraid to knock or in this case even open. I did though; I knocked softly as my arms began to shake with fear. I waited; I waited until my ears picked up footsteps coming towards the door, now my stomach was in a knot and I felt like I wanted to throw up, not because of the body I held close to my chest or because of the emptiness I felt, but because of the fear that grew within my the last couple of seconds. The door finally opened and there she was Ms. Higurashi. Before words could ever be exchanged the widening of hers eyes said many words that no man or demon can ever say in a life time.

"Kagome!" I heard her shriek in madness. The terror written in her face said it all, the screams and cries. I was invisible at the moment, and I didn't mind. Quickly soon after Sota appeared with his grandfather right by his side, their faces matched the woman in front of me.

"What happened to Kagome?" I heard the little boy yell as tears streamed down his face; a thud came across my heart as I witnessed the whole scene. And there it came, an empty feeling right at the middle of my heart. It felt like a knife, right in between me and my heart. The longer I stayed the more it became impossible to want to leave. This wasn't my family, this I knew, but I wished it so deeply they were. Here I was alone once more. Kagome's mother stared directly towards me, with such sadness that it shocked me. I never knew I could see such, such horror. She narrowed her eyes, just like the rest of them. This was no surprise to me.

"What did you do to my daughter you MONSTER!" I stood there saying nothing. What could I say?

Nothing

"I..I'm sorry" Was all I could even say.

"You're sorry? You monster you killed my baby!" She continued to yell; she quickly removed Kagome from my arms and held her tightly. "Kagome, honey open your eyes! Please baby! Your home! Kagome!" I continued to stare at her, she reminded me so much of my mother... mother, how I would give anything to have her back with me!

"Inuyasha why didn't you protect Kagome?" I looked at the voice and it was little Sota, how could I tell him I just stood there and watched his sister die right before my eyes. Now that I noticed, I smelled like Kagome so much now I looked down and I saw all the blood on my robe.

"I-I tried.. "I didn't want to finish my sentence. It was a lie and I knew it.

"I want you out of my house! Out of my house and NEVER come back! Do you hear me? Never come back!" I heard Kagome's mother say as she closed her eyes when she yelled. I felt broken, everything I held so dearly everything I opened my arms to so willingly, and like that I get left tossed aside. I slowly knelt down until I feel my head reach down the floor.

"I'm sorry for your loss.." I said as I knelt like the dog I really was. Shame, pride, and dignity all left my body like a sudden wave, that same wave I felt in the well when I passed time.

"Get out! Get out! GET OUT!" Nothing I said was going to ever change her mind nor mine and I understood that. And like that I stood up and walked away. I turned my back on the one place I really called home, for some time I thought this would be my world, but I only lived in my own illusion. I could have never enter their perfect world, I stopped and titled my head to the side a little and from the corner of my eye I witnessed the door finally close off the last world I ever connected with because they were trapped in their own perfect heaven I would never come to understand.

I walked but I didn't walk to the well, nothing connected me to anything anymore. I didn't worry much over the stares people gave me as I walked down the road; I walked until I saw the grounds Kagome called the park. I walked inside and saw many, many little kids play, they too stared at my strangely covered clothes and probably wondering about my dog ears at the moment, but right now I didn't care. Did I ever really? No it was Kagome who cared. She cared like no one else ever cared for me before; no she cared for me like my mother did all those many years before.

Like Kikyo

I didn't protect her either.

Like my mother

She was the first one I could never protect. Maybe perhaps my father was wrong in a way? Maybe I was never meant to have Tetsusaiga. Me no never, I never protected someone, and when I did they never really lived long enough to say so. Sesshomaru, ...the heartless bastard. He could have never protected anyone, but here he is now..protecting a small child. I started to think over my own little world, perhaps what Kanon was trying to tell me was, and perhaps the world I wanted was the world that would expect me for who I was. Is that all I ever wanted? Somewhere to belong?

Nothing is ever certain

That's right, nothing ever was.

"I told you! He has dog ears!" I heard someone from my left say. I didn't want to turn around, let them have their laugh, and their stare.

"Yes Kei I hear and I see, so what?" It seemed another was along with him, but the guy didn't seem to care on my appearance.

"Skye you idiot! He's looking for it too!" The first voice said, I wanted to turn so badly this time, I really did, but again I didn't. I didn't know them then again I didn't know Kagome either ...She was someone different all the time. She would be my friend, a mother, a healer, a fighter, and just Kagome, but she also held someone I never knew existed. I witnessed, she was just there for a moment and just like that she was gone, just like everyone else.

"Don't bother people Kei, come on lets go" Skye said in a stern voice. This said Kei did not listen to his friend, because he quickly came over to me and pulled on the sleeve on my robe of the fire rat. This time I didn't need to turn because he was something out of this world, he was a small rabbit.

"You have blood all over you! How delightful!" I heard him say, oh yea that's right I am covered in blood.

"Kei I told you not to bother him!" This time Skye's voice was cold like the air around us at the moment.

"No I want to know if he has any luck finding it!"

"What am I finding?" I finally said as I rose my head towards the park around me, but really stared at nothing at all.

"You see? He doesn't even know. Leave him alone" I didn't want them to leave, I knew what they were looking for, but I was pretty sure they had a better idea then to what I was having.

"He's lying!" This time I turned to see this Skye person and he was like the rest of the world. A human. He had long blue wavy shoulder length hair; his left eye was covered in darkness while his right was covered in blood, and his skin was a pale as snow.

"Leave the dog man alone Kei and let's get ourselves going" He said in an annoyed yet tired manner.

"You're talking about Heaven aren't you?" I asked this time, the man said nothing at first. He just stared at me making sure he just heard the exact same words he thought I just asked.

"Yes, he was talking heaven" The bunny jumped around, as if he just won something really important. I guess I wasn't the only one looking for it; this made me happy for some strange reason.

"I told you! I told you!" He continued to say like a mantra.

"My name is Skye Lockheart and this is my companion Kei" Skye said in a more manner of conversation than he started before.

"More like he's my servant" The rabbit said, somewhere inside of me I felt jealous. This was another world I could never fit in, this was their heaven. Skye merely glared at his friend and stared right towards me, I stared back. Right then and there I knew. I knew that right when he looked straight into my eyes I held so much pain. He knew I was lost.

"You're looking at it all wrong" Was what he said to me. I continued to stare into his eyes. "You're heaven isn't here and it'll never be here" Though his words were hurtful, I felt like I already knew. This place wasn't my time. So this could have never been my world.

"Then where..?" I knew this question was stupid, but I asked anyway.

"Back to where you come from.." Was his answer to me. And then what? Search for the jewel shards? Travel all on my own? Again? The look in my eyes gave me away, they always did. "You're still looking at it the wrong way" I couldn't take it! This was a nightmare! My best friend in whom I thought was my best friend died and everyone else left me to rot!

"I don't get it! Tell me! You have to tell me!" I yelled, finally tears streamed down my eyes. Which shocked me. I didn't cry when Kagome was killed, nor did I cry when she betrayed me, I didn't even cry when Miroku told me that it was best that I never saw them again, then why?

"You need to start over" He replied. Start over? How? "Nothing is ever certain.."

Those words I stated aloud, Skye was no longer looking at me. He was too busy looking at the moon that shined its ray at the bottom of both of us. No child was around anymore, when did it get dark?

"Listen, I could tell you all there is about heaven, but what would you gain if I did?" He was right, like the rest of the world. He was absolutely right.

"It would find me right?" I questioned in a sudden sadness, what if it never did? Skye smiled gently and nodded.

"You need to be patient, everything is hard right now, but in the end you will understand" I looked at him for an instant.

"I would understand?" He nodded once more to reassure me. I looked at the moon as my eyes glistened with sadness and the tears continued to fall, I knew he was staring at me. He wanted to know what else I was going to say. "Nothing is ever certain"

I wanted to believe in those words my mother gave me, but now they were lost in the moon staring right back at me waiting. Waiting to see what I would do next, waiting to see if this certain really was never.

* * *

I just want to say this; many are getting confused over the theme of this story. I will explain! Yay! Well Inuyasha is looking for a world of his own he could call happiness, maybe you can call it a calling? Lolz He s looking somewhere he could call Home. He wants to know what the word freedom really means, I mean come on people all his life it's always been about him being half and useless, then it was all about the jewel shards and Naraku split in with love problems and other problems that didn't involve him, but dropped by his lap anyways! Pretty stressful, so can Inuyasha find this world? Or Heaven? If so, will Sesshomaru help him out? Or would he be the reason he never finds it?

Nothing is ever certain ladies and gentlemen. Thank you for reading! Maybe this can deserve a few reviews? Until Next Time! XD


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